I’m available to serve as a panelist, or speak in person or by phone to book groups, schools and libraries.
Since I live in San Francisco, speaking in person at Northern California events is easy to arrange. But if you live elsewhere, let’s talk about it. I love to travel and I may be planning a trip to your area. If not, I’d be happy to join your discussion via the telephone.
Either way, please contact me.
Discussion Points:
In the process of telling Ashley’s story, My Lost and Found Life raises some issues about both mother-daughter relationships and the difficulty of making the transition to adulthood. Below are a few questions for you or your group to ponder. (Note: This is not a test and there are no right answers.)
- The book is a contemporary story about a affluent suburban teenager who lacks any practical life skills to help her cope when her life starts to unravel. Do you think emerging into adulthood is more difficult for young people today than it was in the past?
- The so-called entitlement generation: they want it all and they want it now. Do you think that’s a fair characterization of Ashley and her friends?
- After she accepts that her mother is gone, Ashley struggles to deal with the upheaval her mother’s absence causes. Have you ever faced a situation that you were completely unprepared to handle? What did you do?
- What do you think of Malcolm’s analysis (Chapter 17) of the coffeehouse as a “spiritual home for lonely souls in a big city.” Is he being sappy as William says or does he have a valid point? Some would argue that suburbanites are more, not less, isolated than city dwellers. Do you agree? Does your neighborhood have a social center or gathering place where you go to interact with others?
- Throughout the book it becomes obvious that Ashley has no understanding of financial matters and in Chapter 13 she regrets pursuing the college prep and honors track in school because she has no job skills. Do you think her lack of practical skills is typical? How do you think young people should learn about credit cards, debt, insurance and other economic issues?
- The mothers and daughters in this book have difficult or turbulent relationships Do you think such conflicts are a natural part of parent-child interaction? How do you feel about Ashley’s mother? What kind of parent was she, and why?
- One of Earl’s sayings is that the only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well. Malcolm, however, says “Normal is what I approve of or what I do. Everything else is abnormal.” Do you agree with Earl or Mal? How do you define normal?
- In chapter 22, Ashley says that “hugging my secrets to myself had become a habit.” Have you ever tried to keep a big secret? Did you succeed?
- Ashley has a lot of pride and is determined to solve her problems without anyone knowing about her situation and pitying her because of it. Do you consider her pride a character flaw?
- What did you think of Ashley’s romance with Patrick? Was it a mistake?
- At one point, Ashley studies several articles in women’s magazines to get some tips about erotic trigger points, sexual prowess and bedroom tricks. What do you think of such magazine articles and the kind of sex education they provide to girls like Ashley?
- At the end of the book, Officer Strobel insists that, “An awful lot of people are just plain weak. If they never have to face anything too difficult they’re law-abiding, but the minute a situation turns ugly, it’s impossible to know how they’ll react.” Do you agree with him?
- What elements of this book did you find especially memorable, humorous, or inspiring? Are there individual characters whose beliefs, acts, or motives especially impressed or surprised you?
- What do you think of the novel’s ending? Were you surprised at the way in which these story lines were resolved? Did you think that Ashley’s mother got the ending she deserved?